What is wrong with me!?

Seriously, I'm heading off to Port Hedland in the middle of summer for 20 days? Cyclones, minimum 40 degree Celsius temperatures? You betcha.

It's all about trying to get some more experience writing, and is part of an ECU initiative (along with some other unis) to get us coiffed urban yuppies out there into the country to see what the real deal with aboriginal health is.

If you're from Australia, you'd know that it's one of our greatest shames that the life expectancy of an aboriginal is less than half of the Caucasian counterpart. So every year a bunch of nursing and journalism students go up there as part of a work experience program where the nursing students help out with the hospital up there and the journalism students write for various rags up there for about 20 days.

While there, the students learn about working with aboriginal communities and get to see first hand the conditions in which they live. It's a fantastic initiative to get the journos of tomorrow to see first hand the most unreported story in our culture. They also figure that one or two journos and nurses are going to 'fall in love with the place' and never want to leave (I don't see myself staying, but anything's possible).

So starting on January 4 I'm heading off for 20 days to do some work experience and avoid sunstroke, I'll try and post from there but I'm not too sure about internet access up there.

Anyhow, the other big journalistic story concerning me is my freelance piece for The West Australian.

About two months back I was contacted by one of the lecturers at ECU, along with four other students (the creme de la creme of the print students...or just the one's the lecturers could remember) about possibly doing some work experience for the health and medicine section of the rag. If my article does end up getting published, it'll be good to put in the portfolio and I get paid a whole $150 for my 900 words (shitty rate, but what the hell do I care?). In fact there's a story in today's edition about the dangers about barbecued meat which I'm pretty sure was done by one of the students selected.

I got a story about mobile phones and how Gen-Y are using them to talk about mental health issues rather than 'traditional' mediums such as face to face communication and such.

Here's the copy I sent off to the West, and the copy which was okayed by the editor I'm working with. Take a look, and maybe see where I went wrong, where I went right and what I need to improve on.

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TEXTUAL HEALING

By James McGrath

The internet and mobile phones have been accused of distracting drivers when they’re in traffic, raising the risk of tumours and being responsible of causing a decline of literacy rates amongst an entire generation, but for once mobile phones have received some praise–for having a positive impact on health.

A study published in the Australian Psychiatry journal in October found that young people are using technologies such as SMS–the messaging tools for mobile phones– and the internet to discuss mental health issues with their peers and trained professionals.

Participants in the study, which looked at mental health literacy rates amongst adolescents in rural areas said they preferred SMS and the internet over traditional avenues for seeking help because they felt safe thanks to the relative anonymity the technology offers users.

Authors of the study, Dr Lydia Scott and Associate Professor Anna Chur-Hansen from the University of Adelaide, said while traditional avenues such as face-to-face and using the telephone were important, SMS is encouraging more teenagers to talk about their problems.

“The importance of people being able to share experiences with peers is well-recognised. However this is possibly even more significant during adolescent years when their self-identity is continuing to evolve and change,” Dr Scott said.

“The teenagers involved in the study felt that contacting a friend by SMS may be easier and less confrontational than approaching them face-to-face.

“This is significant as the decision for a young person to seek help may be delayed due to fears of social stigma, which can delay appropriate treatment and affect long term outcomes.”

Health professionals around the world have latched onto this idea, and have started to offer SMS services for those in need.

In South Africa, an SMS helpline was set up in 2006 by the South African Depression and Anxiety Group, to help depressed teenagers in an effort to curb the high rates of suicide in the country, and they received an overwhelming response from participants praising the service.

In India, an SMS information service was launched last year to combat the rising epidemic of HIV/AIDS in the country, where teenagers could SMS their questions about the disease without the stigma of having their peers knowing that they were asking about it. Within a month the service had received 25 000 texts.

Closer to home, mental health groups beyondblue, Headspace and Reach Out! have all launched SMS information campaigns in the past in an attempt to reach at-risk youth, and regularly use the internet to reach a new audience.

Reach Out! launched an online forum service in 2005, in which people can come and talk to each other and health professionals in a safe and anonymous setting.

Interactive manager Marianne Webb says that by using an online service, Reach Out! have been able to allocate its limited resources more effectively given the low-cost nature of the project while reaching teens in a brand new way.

“The advantages of reaching at-risk young people online are that you are engaging young people in an environment where they have a sense of control, they feel comfortable and are able to remain anonymous” she said.

“Young people are often worried about their parents or friends finding out, especially if they are considering going to a school counsellor or live in a small rural community.

“Knowing where and how to access to help is another reason that the internet and services such as the Reach Out! forum is the first step young people take in getting professional help”

===========================================================================

*Please note this is not the version which will appear in The West Australian and should be considered such*

What is wrong with lying?: part deux

Well, I've submitted my review to the team at the Escapist for them to go through it with a fine tooth-comb, and hopefully my weaknesses in the genre will become evident.

That's right, as a writer about to go into the workforce I'm looking for the most criticism I can get, the harsher the better. Only through thorough examination (internal or external) can you ever get better as a writer, so it's something that all training journos should be looking to do.

The better writer's the better, as they'll see problems with your writing that others will simply ignore.

Anyhow, here's the copy I sent them after a few alterations. Here's a fun game, try to guess where I changed it and why I did it!

======================================================================================

Football Manager 2009

Another year, another itineration of the Football Manager series and another ulcer for my trouble. You see, Football Manager is one of those games which not only requires an intellectual investment on the part of the player but also requires an emotional one. Not bad stuff for a glorified spreadsheet.

It creates that ‘just one more turn’ factor well as you’ll often find yourself trying to finalise a transfer fee for that gun striker at 2AM with bleary eyes. So Football Manager 2009 has had a successful formula to work off, and by all rights should be able to just update the stats each year and sell to their niche market, but instead the team at Sega decided to muddy the waters a bit. Whether this be a bold choice or a stupid design decision depends on your understanding of the phrase ‘if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it’.

The things that don’t change in this year’s effort are the things that attract players to the series. Football Manager veterans know what I’m talking about when I say those little circles representing the players on your team become much more than graphical representations of number-crunching; they become your team. You’ll howl every time they concede, and crack open a bottle of bubbly every time they score an injury-time winner.

It’s risky business trying to muck with a formula like that, so why in Maradonna would you do it? The team at Sega decided it was time to mess with the formula in an effort to take the immersion level up to 11.

The big thing they did in this version is introduce a whole new graphical element to the experience; a 3D engine. Now that may not seem to be a big deal, but when your experience of a game series is entirely informed by a 2D interface, adding a new dimension is like…adding a new dimension to the experience. So does it work or is it just a pretty diversion?

Well, I’ve got good news and bad news for you all. The good news is that the engine while nowhere near FIFA eye-melting levels does a solid job of representing the game we love. The movement of the players is just what you’d expect from watching a game of football, and the players move in a realistic way. That may not seem like much, but it’s really well done and is for the most part a welcome addition to the core match day experience.

Now for the bad news.

It seems that Sega really wants this new 3D match engine to succeed, so much so that the revised 2D screens look like the dog’s breakfast. Just a few short years ago the 2D match engine looked clean and was the basis for the game’s popularity, but now its circles have seen better days and are in dire need of a good anti-aliasing. Theoretically you can still choose to play with a 2D match engine, but what’s the point when the 3D version looks halfway decent and the 2D engine makes you eyes bleed? It’s like saying goodbye to a part of my gaming heritage, it’s just sad is all. If that wasn’t bad enough, the graphical needs of the 3D match engine may just push this title out of the ‘runs on the smell of an oily processor’ category.

In previous versions of the Football Manager series, the graphical requirements of running the game was pretty much the ability to render Skifree. With Football Manager 09 though you’ll need to be packing a Radeon 9800 at a minimum which may not seem like you’ll be breaking the bank for a new graphics card, but this game is supposed to be a glorified spreadsheet after all.

But despite the downside to introducing a new match engine, Football Manager 09 doesn’t throw the baby out with the bathwater and remains the authoritative football management sim on the market.

The introduction of a couple of nice touches help smooth out the criticisms. The addition of a press conference that you as manager can attend is a great way to involve you in the game world. Given the whole selling point of the series is “You can be the manager!”, it’s a surprise this option wasn’t included in previous versions of the game.

The press conferences are structured well, and if handled correctly can give your team a morale boost and put the fear of God into your opposition. Responses to questions are limited however, so you can’t exactly go on a Jose Mourinho-esque rant in the middle of a journalist’s question, but it’s still an addition that adds to the core appeal of the game.

The addition of real-time feedback from your assistant coach is a great inclusion as well, and really helps you out in diagnosing where your team may be going wrong or which threats you need to neutralise. For example, if the opposition starts pushing players forward and their defensive line is pushing up too, your assistant manager will tell you about it so you can switch your tactics to sitting deep and counter-attacking to exploit the space behind the defence. It’s an addition that will have you thinking like a real manager, and this is what the series and game is all about.

It’s called Football Manager, and this game lets you be exactly that as you ride the highs of championships, the nerve-wracking lows of a relegation scrap and feel the pride of finding a gem of a player in the youth ranks and nurturing him to superstardom. The stats you love are there, the gameplay which entrances you is there and despite Sega almost dropping the ball with the match engine, Football Manager 09 remains the benchmark by which all other football management sims are measured.

Recommendation: Buy it if you’re a football nut or want a new sim to play with, otherwise it’s probably not for you.

What is wrong with lying?

Okay, so I lied. This post won't be about an article for The West and my sojourn to Port Hedland, shoot me. Instead I thought you (the google bots that crawl this page) would get a kick out of following a piece of writing from the moment of conception to the publishing stage.

Okay, so here's the premise. After writing journalism for yonks (I believe that's the technical term for it anyhow) my other styles of writing have been suffering and in particular, my review skills. You see, I used to be able to write a mean review, so I've found my skills to be slipping lately, so I thought what better way to get back into the swing of things than trying to get a review published?

My target, the guest review spot on The Escapist. I chose it because they're known for great quality writing and submitting to them would put my writing through some pretty stringent standards.

So I've submitted a couple of reviews so far, and the feedback (excellent feedback from Susan Arendt by the by) I've gotten back is basically 'You're a good writer, but this is a bit self-indulgent', which is fair, but they asked for a 'unique voice' in all guest submissions, and how you're supposed to add voice without becoming self-indulgent is proving to be a tightrope.

So, I went back to the drawing board and came up with a review of Football Manager 2009. I'm aware there's an inherent danger in pitching a 'soccer' game to an American publisher but I'm willing to take that shot.

Hopefully, my draft is less self-indulgent than my previous efforts and I've learned from my mistakes because that is a crucial part of any job, let alone journalism where anybody and everybody can write but few can do it well.

Anyhow here's the draft, and I'll let you all know about what sort of feedback I get from Arendt when I pitch it after the holidays.

====================================================================

Football Manager 2009

James McGrath

Another year, another itineration of the Football (the type in which the ‘foot’ part is emphasised) Manager series and another ulcer for my trouble. You see, Football Manager is one of those games which not only requires an intellectual investment on the part of the player but also requires an emotional one. Not bad stuff for a game which has been dubbed a glorified spreadsheet.

It creates that ‘just one more turn’ factor well as you’ll often find yourself trying to finalise a transfer fee for that gun striker at 2AM with bleary eyes. So Football Manager 2009 has had a successful formula to work off, and by all rights should be able to just update the stats each year and sell to their niche market, but instead the team at Sega decided on a not so quiet revolution. Whether this be a bold choice or a stupid design decision depends on your understanding of the phrase ‘if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it’.

Those of you who have played any of the Football Manager games know what I’m talking about when I say those little circles representing the players on your team become much more than graphical representations of number-crunching; they become your team. You’ll howl every time they concede, and crack open a bottle of bubbly every time they score an injury-time winner. So why in Maradonna would you muck with a formula like that? It’s evident the team at Sega decided it was time to muck with the formula in an effort to take the immersion level created by those stats and screens up to 11.

The big thing they did in this version is introduce a whole new graphical element to the experience; a 3D engine. Now that may not seem to be a big deal, but when your experience of a game is entirely informed by a 2D interface, adding a new dimension is like…adding a new dimension to the experience. The question is, does it work or is it just a pretty diversion?

Well, I’ve got good news and bad news for you all. The good news is that the engine while nowhere near FIFA eye-melting levels does a solid job of representing the game we love. The movement of the players is just what you’d expect from watching a game of football, and the players move in a realistic way. That may not seem like much, but it’s really well done and is a welcome addition to the core match day experience.

Now for the bad news.

It seems that Sega really wants this new 3D match engine to succeed, so much so that the revised 2D screens look like the dog’s breakfast. Just a few short years ago the 2D match engine looked clean and was the basis for the game’s popularity, but now its circles have seen better days and are in dire need of a good anti-aliasing. Theoretically you can still choose to play with a 2D match engine, but what’s the point when the 3D version looks halfway decent and the 2D engine makes you eyes bleed? It’s like saying goodbye to a part of my gaming heritage, it’s just sad is all. If that wasn’t bad enough, the graphical needs of the 3D match engine may just push this title out of the ‘runs on the smell of an oily processor’ category.

In previous versions of the Football Manager series, the graphical requirements of running the game was the ability to render Skifree. Okay, so that may be a slight exaggeration but it really didn’t need much at all, with Football Manager 09 though you’ll need to be packing a Radeon 9800 at a minimum. That may not seem like you’ll be breaking the bank for a new graphics card, but this game is supposed to be a glorified spreadsheet.

But despite the downside to introducing a new match engine, Football Manager 09 doesn’t throw the baby out with the bathwater and remains the authoritative football management sim on the market.

The introduction of a couple of nice touches help smooth out the criticisms. The addition of a press conference that you as manager can attend is a great way to involve you in the game world. Given the whole selling point of the series is “You can be the manager!”, it’s a surprise this option wasn’t included in previous versions of the game.

The press conferences are structured well, and if handled correctly can give your team a morale boost and put the fear of God into your opposition. Responses to questions are limited however, so you can’t exactly go on a Jose Mourinho-esque rant in the middle of a journalist’s question, but it’s still an addition that adds to the core appeal of the game.

It’s called Football Manager, and this game lets you be exactly that as you ride the highs of championships, the nerve-wracking lows of a relegation scrap and feel the pride of finding a gem of a player in the youth ranks and nurturing him to superstardom. The stats you love are there, the gameplay which entrances you is there and despite Sega almost dropping the ball with the match engine, Football Manager 09 remains the benchmark by which all other football management sims are measured.

What is wrong with doing work experience at Christmas time?

There's not actually that much to do. The news has slowed to a trickle and you don't have time to do any sort of meaningful work because everybody's going on holidays soon.

I recently undertook a work placement at Aspermont, the company responsible for a multitude of trade publications including Mining Monthly and Biotechnology News. My role while I was there was to turn around press releases and turn them into something somewhat readable. Basically, I was a shitkicker who didn't have that much to do, yet it still remained an invaluable learning experience (plus I got a few bylines which is always good).

It helped me to see where my weaknesses lie in terms of writing and which areas are my strengths. I'll start with the minuses as these are weaknesses that all up and coming journos can learn from.

In a nutshell, I was lazy with my writing. Because I was basically turning around press releases within 20 minutes or so I didn't put enough effort into checking and re-checking my work, and consequently I made a few tiny mistakes with my punctuation surrounding quotes (another of my weaknesses).

I also on the odd-occasion decided to demote people in various positions in stories I was writing. For example, one day I decided that some guy wasn't deserving of a CEO status, so I decided to demote him to a COO. That's the kind of shite that will get angry phone calls. Luckily I only did that once, and it wasn't a systemic thing.

One piece of advice that Nick Evans (Biotech editor) offered me at the end of my experience is that at this junior level, it always pays to spend an extra ten minutes with your copy unless the editor is yelling at you to finish up. Getting out copy quick is good, getting it out quick and with the odd-mistake will just make you look lazy.

Other (understandable) mistakes I made came from just not knowing the territory. For example, I don't know the people at the companies I was writing about, I didn't know if a company's capital raising was a roaring success or not and I didn't know why one company's better than another one.

One hilarious mistake I made was assuming that an oil reserve being "capped and suspended as a site for further development" was a bad thing. Turns out that the sentence didn't mean the company was giving up on the reserve, but just capping it and coming back to it later. I also made the hilarious mistake of describing a company's falling stock price as part of a horror year for the company (It's the middle of a financial crisis! Everybody's stock has gone down you idiot James!).

I also made the mistake of not being punchy enough with my first pars and slipping into passive and throwing a little too much colour into my stories.

Most of these mistakes though were made on the first day, and I straightened up and flew right after that. In fact the people at the company were impressed by my ability to adapt and change my style at the behest of their advice, and other than the small mistakes I made they said I was one of the better work experience kids they have had.

They said my copy was clean (relatively), tight and that it seemed I knew how to throw a verb or two around, you know, bend an ear with a turn of phrase.

My writing has been described as an 'easy' style, which is one of my greatest strengths. It means that writing seems to come naturally to me, rather than being a forced style, and this is down to a couple of key points.

First, I was diagnosed as borderline autistic when I was a child. I wasn't, they didn't know what the hell was wrong with me, but I did take longer to actually speak with any coherence than other people. In fact, I didn't start to speak properly and with any sort of confidence until I was about eight, so I found that writing things down helped my communicate without the stigma of actually having to speak (probably why I suck at broadcast).

Secondly, I'm online a lot. I chat online a lot but not once do I abbreviate or engage in 'text speak'. I write fully formed sentences which when it comes to doing so for the purposes of a piece of journalism, writing properly come naturally because it's the only style of writing I know.

So if you're an aspiring journo and you need better written English skills, it would probably be a good idea to write properly in all facets of your communicative life so that it comes easily when you start to write professionally.

Anyhow, I hope you were able to gleam something from that hotch-potch of ideas I just threw at you, and it will help you identify your weaknesses and strengths as a writer so that more people go out there into the workforce at ease with the tool of their trade.

Next time on the Jaded Prime, details of a freelance article written for The West and Jimmy's sojourn to Port Hedland next year.

What is wrong with my memory?

Well, it seems with all the hustle and bustle of completing my degree my memory of this blog has faded like my favourite pair of jeans. So, I'm sorry (to the one or two google bots who actually read this thing) I've been so lax in my writing but I've had other things on my mind.

Well, I've graduated for one thing. I managed to grab an above-distinction average for the third year, a period in which I actually chose journalism as a career choice and started to take it seriously.

I've also been fired for no particular reason, although if you were ask my employer if she fired me she'll say that she just couldn't hold a spot on the roster for me anymore or one of those weasel excuses.

If you put the pieces together though, I was fired to cut costs. I was one of the oldest employees there, so I had a higher paycheck than everybody else. It's the middle of a financial crisis and her husband works at an insurance firm while they try to pay off their mortgage.

You don't have to be a genius to put those things together to paint a bleak picture about the balance of power shifting in the wake of climbing unemployment.

A bleak picture has also been painted for the environment this week too, with the Rudd government releasing the 'white' paper, which may as well have been made out of baby seals as far as environmentalists were concerned.

The paper outline an emissions target for 2020, and for a Prime Minister whose campaign ran on green promises, the outcomes were most disappointing indeed.

It turns out all that modeling done by the CSIRO and scientists around the globe was absolute bubkis, and we need not adhere to any sort of target which will stretch us in any way. Instead of the minimum 20 per cent reduction in greenhouse gases most people have called for the Rudd government outlined a minimum five per cent cut, to rise to 15 per cent if other countries follow suit at Copenhagen.

To the cries of angry environmentalists and an almost speechless Bob Brown, they spruiked their plan as "striking the right balance" between economic concerns and environmental ones. I do concede that the economic downturn would create some pressure to scale down ambitions, but nobody expected this.

Of course business groups cried poor and said the plan would be a burden on business, despite the money promised to polluting industry to offset any losses from the emissions trading scheme, and the government has come out and applied some creative mathematics to make everything seem alright.

The government said that a five per cent target would equate to a 34 per cent per capita reduction and a 15 per cent target would equate to a 41 per cent reduction. True, our low capita base lends itself to the argument the we should do less because we don't pollute that much.

The thing is though, and this is very important; you're only taking five per cent of the pollution out of the air.

It doesn't matter about what we do on a per capita basis, it only matters about what we do in a gross tonnage reduction sense. We could do a 50 per cent reduction per capita and the Great Barrier Reef would still be at risk of dying, what matters is the raw amount you take out of the air.

Of course, this sits pretty with the popularist leanings of the Rudd government, that its trying to rationalise a failing as a win for the Australian people. He's trying to reassure us that we're doing our bit for the environment when his government does effectively nothing, just so he can throw around the sexy figures of a 41 per cent reduction per capita.

It's a shame the environment doesn't care about figures.

What is wrong with going stir-crazy?

You start to look at staplers in a whole new light. Here's a review. Sorry for the funky formatting, Blogger is being a tad weird tonight.

====================================================================

Since the beginning of time, I have had many staplers. I have had a standard workhorse stapler that got the job done but didn't exactly set the world on fire with its ergonomic design. I have had a pop-culture referential red stapler that was a good for nothing layabout that jammed half the time, very frustrating when you can't find a paperclip, let me tell you! But none, have compared to the stapler I have in my hot little hand right now.

It's a Stanley Bostitch, for those of you in the know, you'd already be aware of it's competition leading efficiency, but this year Stanley have truly blown me away with a mixture of form and function that is hard to beat.

Yea, if God had a stapler, it would verily be a Stanley Bostitch. Yet there is something darker about this device that speaks to a more satanic origin, almost if it were calling to me to do unspeakable acts.

It's just so...sexy.

Let's begin with the essential functions and work our way up to the more elegant design shall we?

First of all, you'll no doubt be relieved to hear that it holds a standard 10mm clip so you'll no longer have to worry about getting to the specialty staples shop before it closes. If I had a stapler for all the times I've been caught outside the staples store at closing time, I would be in some sort of orgasmic nirvana.

It's spring loaded, so it operates quite like the standard stapler, which you would think would be something holding it back from greatness but instead I see it as a plus. Think back on all the great innovations of stapler loading mechanism history, and you'll find that the spring loaded is indeed the mechanism that has stood the test of time. Indeed, it's so simple to operate that a child could do it (ages 5 and up).

Once you have your staples ready to go, you'll want to know if the stapler can go all night long...by which I mean whether it won't fail you on sheet 999 of a massive stapling party.

I'm pleased to report that it can go the distance and more, its stamina was quite a pleasant surprise that it had me wondering why I ever went around that that stupid old paperclip...in my pocket.

You could literally staple all day with the Stanley Bostitch, it's that reliable, and the satisfaction you get from the crisp sound of paper being penetrated kept this reviewer up through many a lonely night.

But now, we come to the real sexiness, its design.

It employs the Strapford-upon-Hertforshire school of stapler design, and the Stanley Bostitch has all the hallmarks of veteran designer Thomas Scrote.

None of this smooth and sleek design that have you in two minds as to whether or not you're looking at a stapler, instead, the Scrote design leaves you in no doubt as to what you're looking at. He manages to capture the aesthetic of stapler deign over the last 50 years and condense it into something so pure, to typical of the beauty of the stapler that, I'm not afraid to admit this, I bawled like it was my first stapler all over again.

By God I'm glad I have my Scrote...umm...Scrote-designed stapler by my side!

In summary, if you appreciate the beauty and raw sexual power of the stapler, you have to buy the [i]Stanley Bostitch for you and everybody you know. Together, we can make the whole world cry with the sounds of a million sheets of paper being penetrated by the [i]Bostitch.

It's quite simply, a masterpiece of stapler deign and this will be the model that they study in classrooms for years to come.

20 BILLION STARS

P.S- I'm so lonely.

What is wrong with freelancing?

You have to fucking good at it to even get a call back saying that they won't pick up your article.

As you may or may not know, I've been enrolled in a unit called Freelance Journalism. Which is cool because there are no classes and we basically set our own work schedule. Anyhow, the first assignment is to write a profile article.

But who do I write a profile article on? That's basically the starting point for any piece, so I started looking at the webirverse to see if there were any up and coming or established authors or artists coming to town. Perth being the backwater hick town it is, nobody of note was coming here.

So then I started to do a search for stand-up comedians, and I noticed that Claire Hooper was coming to town soon for a show. Bingo.

Here's a person who's originally from Perth, has a good profile (she's the chick from Good News Week) and the more research I did on her, the more interesting her story became.

She started out in Perth doing theatre work, and was a bit of a jack of all trades. She wrote, directed, acted, designed costumes but what struck me about her background is that she did experimental re-working of Shakespeare. You know, stuff like reducing Hamlet to 90 minutes and 3 cast members.

So how does someone go from Hamlet to hamming it up?

I had my angle on a Perth girl and she was coming to town soon. This profile pretty much wrote itself, and I was sure I had a story I could sell.

So I got down to the business of arranging an interview, so I contacted her management via email. I got nothing back for a couple of days, until the woman who was arranging the comedy show that Hooper was in town for got in touch with me.

Now, what she told me was very interesting. She told me that she'd already pitched the story to editors of The West and Sunday Times, and they were nibbling at it. That is to say they were undecided on the story.

Now, being a freelance journo who was ready right then to conduct an interview and write a story, I managed to grab the interview.

So I'm now on the phone to Claire Hooper who's in Melbourne, and it's a pretty easy interview. It's one of those interviews that I can just stay silent for, and she'll answer two or three of my questions with one long-winded answer. She's very chatty, and I managed to get some great anecdotes out of her about her youth and how she got into comedy.

I have my research, I've transcribed the audio and I'm sitting with a blank page ready to write.

The words flow like fine wine, and within two days I have a 2000 word profile article that probably not going to win me a Walkley, but is a good yarn all the same. So now all I have to do it sell it.

I pitch it at two newspapers, two websites and two magazines. Only one got a definite answer back to me. What I did was this; I sent the story along with two hi-res images of Claire and a pitch to each of these places. I left my phone number and email address on the pitch.

Two days have gone, and I decide it's been sitting long enough, and I start to do a ring-around to the places I pitched at. I get the old, 'she's not in her office at the moment...' line, and there's nothing too much you can do about it.

The West though, to their credit actually got back to me when I rung them with a very nicely worded rejection letter that wished me all the best. When I rang PerthNow, the editor informed me that he had been on leave and was just catching up on his emails. Fair enough, he said he'd back to me at the end of the day.

I took him at his word and he didn't get back to me. Okay, so I called him again twice in two days and 'he was in a meeting'. FUCK!

So anyhow, I didn't end up selling the story to anybody, which sucks because I need the money for my new website I'm planning.

The moral of the story here is that you have to be a complete and utter nuisance to editors to even get a rejection letter back. This is doubly true if your relatively new and they have no idea who you are.

Next time on The Jaded Prime, the art of the market wrap.

Jimmy.

What is wrong with my life?!

Nothing really,I'm just way too busy to update this blog.

I shaved my head today, and I've written a profile on Claire Hooper which I'm trying to sell, and when I get some time I'll update you all on the process behind that.

I'll also begoing through how to write a market report, which is FUCKING fascinating.

From Jimmy.

What is wrong with having a bad sub?

Hi, sorry about the complete lack of post in a while, but I've been hard at work preparing a post that should give the aspiring journo out there a reason to try their hand at subbing. You see, every so often you write a story you think is good, and then you run it through a set of subs and it actually comes out worse than when it came in.

Sadly, this has happened to me on more than a few occasions. Perhaps the one that is freshest in my mind is a story I wrote a while back on a new type of security camera. I'm not going to say my article was perfect (it never is) , but it was a good piece of writing.

Below, is the copy I submitted to the subs.

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My heart was already in San Francisco, but my body was stuck in a security checkpoint. My eyes were staring at the bald patch at the gentleman in front of me, my feet were shuffling forward inch-by-inch and my thumbs were left twiddling.

We've all had to wait in security before, as a multitude of people pass through the scanners, with the line moving like salmon upstream. We've all had to wait as that one particular person didn't quite grasp the concept of not taking metallic objects through the scanner

You start to wonder why this sadistic airport has windows. It's like being told you can only take out that Ferarri in first gear.

Luckily, some clever British company, ThruVision, has come up with a new security imaging system.

Based on some of the technology used in deep space exploration, the T5000 Security Imaging System is able to 'see' under the clothes of people standing 25 metres away. The people can even be moving, reducing bottlenecks at security checkpoints.

But how can this new fangled system do that and still not emit huge pulses of energy? Well, instead of the traditional X-Ray that emits a low level of radiation, the T5000 is a passive system that picks up T-Rays.

T-Rays are small amounts of energy given off naturally by all materials, including animals, people and plants. These emissions can travel through smoke, and more physical objects such as clothing. The T5000 merely picks up these energy signatures and uses them to form an image that can reveal hidden objects. Nifty Huh?

That all means that the line can keep on moving and detect objects under a person's clothes, well before they reach a security checkpoint. You can imagine the relief of not having to be subjected to the X-Ray ritual anymore, but using T-Rays can make security operations a lot more efficient.

As CEO of ThruVision, Clive Beattie explains: "The T5000 dramatically extends the security surveillance envelope for ThruVision's passive body scanning products used at important sites and events. The ability to see both metallic and non-metallic items on people out to 25m is certainly a key capability that will enhance any comprehensive security system deployment."

Some of you may be concerned that the ability to 'see under' clothing from 25 metres away may just be humilating as a long range strip search, but ThruVision is quick to point out that the T5000 doesn't see any 'surface anatmical effects'.

Indeed, news of yet another type of security camera may just have some civil libertarians on edge, and with good reason too.

For example, in the UK (where the T5000 was concieved), contains about 20 per cent of the worlds CCTV Cameras with a total of about 4.2 Million installed. That's about one camera for every fourteen people in the entire UK.

Yet CCTV systems, despite record installation numbers, have not been a total success. You'd think that plonking masses of cameras everywhere would have effectively stopped crime, but in a study publiched by the Home Office in 2002 found that "CCTV had no effect on violent crime"

So is the implementation of another type of camera in the form of the T5000 going to stop all crime? More than likely, no.

Yet as I think back on all the times I've been stuck at security waiting for the line to move even an inch, the T5000 imaging camera seems like an attractive prospect. Indeed, for any traveller, the ability to waltz through security is a welcome change from staring at the bald spot of the gentleman in front of you.
===================================================================

It's hardly going to win a Walkley, but it's a nice little article about a security camera that's somewhat well written and wouldn't look out of place in a general interest mag.

Now see what happened when the subs got their hands on the story.

===================================================================
A camera that can see under people's clothes? Not as seedy as it sounds. James McGrath investigates the T5000 imaging camera.

My heart was already in San Francisco, but my body was stuck at a security checkpoint. My eyes were staring at the bald patch on the gentleman in front of me, my feet were shuffling forward inch by slow inch and I was left twiddling my thumbs.

We’ve all had to wait at security, as a multitude of people pass through the scanners, and the line snakes forward slowly at a snail’s pace. And we’ve all had to wait and watch that one particular person who doesn’t quite grasp the concept of not taking metallic objects through the scanner.

You start to wonder which sadist designed the airport with windows so you could see outside without any hope of getting there anytime soon. It’s like being told you can take that Ferrari out ... but only in first gear.

Luckily, a clever British company, ThruVision, has come up with a new security imaging system. It’s called the T5000 Security Imaging System and is based on technology used in deep space exploration.

In essence the T5000 is a camera that can ‘see’ under people's clothes even if they're standing up to 25 metres away. It even works if the people in question are moving. This means that a line can keep moving while the camera detects objects under people’s clothes well before they reach the security checkpoint. It’s thought this new system will help reduce crowd bottlenecks at security checkpoints.

But how does the newfangled system do all this? And will it emit huge pulses of unhealthy energy in the process? Well, the answer to the second question is 'no' it will not, because unlike traditional X-Rays that emit low levels of radiation, the T5000 is a passive system that picks up terahertz rays, or T-rays.

T-Rays are a small amount of energy given off naturally by all materials, including animals, people and plants. These emissions can travel through smoke, and more physical objects such as clothing. They are, however, blocked by water and metal. The T5000 merely picks up these energy signatures and uses them to form an image that can reveal hidden objects. Nifty huh?

Now some may be concerned that the T5000’s ability to 'see under’ clothing may act as a long range strip search, but ThruVision is quick to point out that the T5000 doesn’t see any ‘surface anatomical effects’.

CEO of ThruVision, Clive Beattie explained how the T5000 could also make security operations more efficient: “The T5000 dramatically extends the security surveillance envelope for ThruVision’s passive body scanning products used at important sites and events. The ability to see both metallic and non-metallic items on people out to 25m is certainly a key capability that will enhance any comprehensive security system deployment.”

So is the implementation of the T5000 going to effectively stop all crime? Most likely not. If we recall, CCTV cameras were supposed to stop crime. The UK (where the T5000 was conceived), contains about 20 percent of the world’s CCTV cameras with a total of 4.2 million installed. That’s about one camera for every 14 people. You’d think plonking masses of cameras everywhere would have effectively stopped crime, but a 2002 study published by the UK Home Office found that “CCTV had no effect on violent crime”.

If the T5000 lives up to expectations the welcome change for all those who’ve ever been stuck at security waiting for the line to move forward by even an inch, will be the prospect of waltzing through without having to spend hours studying the bald spot on the gentleman in front.
===================================================================

The guts of the story are still there, but any writer will be able to spot the glaring changes made, and be horrified by the subbing work on this story.

That is why the future journalists need more subs. We need people either going straight into cadetship or going through uni to not only think in terms of being a good journo, but also in terms of being a good sub. If you can bring both skills to the table, then you have more than a shot at landing a job.

What is wrong with this semester?

Well, it's not bad actually.

I'm just going to give you a quick run-down of what I'll be doing for my FINAL SEMESTER OF UNIVERSITY EVER. I'm sure that statement won't come back to bite me on the bum, no siree!

Anyhow, first up for the film and video side of my degree I'll be kicking things off with Psychoanalysis and Cinema.

A whole bunch of reading, a whole bunch o' Hitchcock and one freakin' big essay (3000 words). Okay, so maybe it's not that big. Maybe I can treat it like one convoluted feature article, let's see how that goes. Anyhow, it seems like a good ol' fashioned theory unit which I should pass.

Then we move onto Screen Evolution.

Now this is an odd one. It's technically a theory unit, but we get to make about 4 short films in it, but they have to relate to the theoretical aspects of the unit, which is to with exploring the screen.

That means exploring the possibilities and theories behind screen technology, and how they have enhanced our perception of the world around us. It's a theory unit which has heavy production elements, which is odd.

Onto the journalism units which is why you're all here...either that or you googled porn and the result was this blog. Hard to say.

Anyhow, the first unit is Freelance journalism.

This is very much an independent study unit, with students given four articles to write of varying lengths. It is then our task to go out and contact various newsrooms and see if they want to buy the story we're writing. Which is awesome because if your article is any good, you can apply for a staffer position after your degree is finished.

We also get paid for our articles which is totally awesome for a uni student.

The second journalism unit is Business Journalism.

This unit is designed to give students a grounding in economic principles and theory, so they won't feel daunted when their editor tells them to do a market wrap or to write about regulations surrounding a company recently floated on the ASX.

I've done a teensy little bit of this in the past, but I'm still learning quite a bit at this stage which can only make me more employable.

Plus we get to play Monopoly!

Anyhow, this post was for all those of you who were curious about what I'm doing this semester.

Don't worry, normal service will resume soon and youll have some rants about the climate and journalism at large.

What is wrong with an ETS?

For those of you outside of Australia, the current political hot potato over here is the introduction of an Emissions Trading Scheme (ETS).

Let's face it, our earth is going to hell one degree at a time and a properly implemented ETS would be a great step toward a sustainable future for our country. That, and investment in Geo-Thermal energy *cough*.

As the government wrangles out the details behind a proposed scheme, the political moves behind the scheme make for some interesting political grandstanding.

You see, the former Liberal government (which is now in opposition with a new leader...Malcom Turnbull I think his name is?) at the last general election was trying to limit the damage from being an 'ungreen' party by stating that its aim was to introduce an ETS from the get-go.

Now, the Liberal Party is opposing any implementation of an ETS until at least 2010. For a piece of legislature that is already 10 years too late, that's a big call.

So why this seemingly anti-green stance?

Well, the shadow government is keen to paint Kevin Rudd and Penny Wong (Environment Minister) as populists keen to inflate their own egos without consideration to well-drafted legislation.

On the Sunday program today, Malcom Turnbull accused the government of rushing out this legislation in order to capitalise on pro-green sentiment.

He has a point.

You see, very little detail has come out regarding the finer points of the ETS, and the government has done a very good job of keeping the Australian public in the dark.

"This new ETS is good for the environment, that's all you need to know"

Yet, the government has stated the ETS would be modeled on the somewhat (from an Aussie POV) successful ETS started in Europe. The fact is, the ETS probably will be good for the environment, after a few learning difficulties.

Mr Turnbull said the government had adopted a 'wait and see' approach to climate change. He said they wanted to wait to see the outcomes of the next US Election and the next environment conference in Copenhagen to gauge whether or not it would be worth the trouble.

The shadow government's reasoning being that without China and India on board, any efforts to change would be fruitless and end up costing Australian taxpayers an arm and a leg.

At this point, Mr Turnbull grew thick eyebrows as they went back to that old stance of 'Those furriners are costing our battlers money'.

So the tactic from the shadow government is to aim squarely at the hip pocket of the Australian voter and to paint the Labor government as pie-in-the sky idealists without a sense of economic reality.

The more things change, the more they stay the same.

The question remains, would a rushed ETS now be better than an fully thought out ETS further down the track? Can our planet afford to take another one for the team?

Thoughts?

What is wrong with the young'uns?

I try not to give authors free publicity, but this video I stumbled across makes some good points about the youth of today.

It features Mark Bauerlein taking about his new book The Dumbest Generation,which makes a pretty valid argument regarding the cons of a digital culture.

He argues that although the digital offers unrivaled information access for young people, that the young people are not taking advantage of this. Now,I'm one of those young people, and it makes a heck of a lot of sense.

When teenagers and young adults go online, they don't go to check out Othello from the school library. They go to the entertainment sites to watch stupid films, and to social networking sites to find other people with exactly the same interests.

It is one of modern life's great ironic twists that when a new generation is faced with the oppurtunity to have the greatest level of education that any generation has ever recieved, we are so eager to wallow in familiarity.

Sure, there are exceptions to the rule, but have you talked to a teenager lately?

Ask them to point to Iraq on a map, recite a poem or discuss Fellinni and you'll get a blank stare and an oh so sad 'gah?'.

Once upon a time, young people were intelectually curious. Libraries flourished, art house cinemas were able to operate, but texts were scarce. Perhaps because of this scarcity, that people developed a hunger for knowledge, a desire for understanding.

Now, we have the potential to have anything we want at our fingertips, just waiting for curious young minds to devour. The internet is the biggest library of all, with reams of new information added every day. Indeed,one can spend a whole day on the internet and not scratch the surface.

Instead, young people are using the internet to scracth the event horizon of a blackhole of ignorance.

Instead of seeking out new information to learn and to digest, young people are seeking out ignorant others to talk about asinine topics to feel better about their own vacuous selves.

Of course, they're all very special of course. They're individuals who make a meaningful contribution to society. Why try to become a productive member of society when you're already special?

That seems to be the overriding attitudes being taught in schools. Time was, you could actually get a fail mark at school, now it's harder to fail than pass. What kind of freaky-deaky culture is that?

Ladies and Gentlemen, this is truly the dumbest generation. Dumb not because we don't know our times tables, not dumb because we can't recite Homer (You know...the Greek dude) but dumb because we do not attempt to rectify this situation.

We have convinced ourelves that we are worthy of society despite not contributing, and convinced ourselves that taking the hard road is just dumb.

What is wrong with Melville vs Westside?

Couldn't really come up with a good title there. Anyhow, thought it might be cool to give y'all a look at one of this round's draft reports before it's edited, just to show you what I was on about a couple of posts ago. This should hit the Hockey WA site tomorrow provided I haven't been sued for defamation or anything pleasant like that.

Enjoy hockey fans!

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MELVILLE FIGHT BACK TO WIN

Melville recorded a come from behind 2-1 over Westside Wolves at Melville Turf on Sunday afternoon, in the Wizard Home Loans Cup.

Westside was looking to push into the top four, and Melville was hoping to keep its faint finals chances alive.

Westside grabbed the early initiative though, and looked to play the ball down the right hand side, whereas Melville was content to play on the counter attack. This approach worked well for Melville, who created the better chances early despite the Wolves pressure.

Ten minutes in, Westside’s Russell Ford was able to get a shot in using the reverse stick, to create the first meaningful opportunity of the half.

As Melville made the most of their possession, Westside was unable to capitalise on their possession, despite some promising lead-up play.

Westside almost went ahead with 22 minutes played, with a shot from Justin McDougall going just wide following a short corner.

Melville held on to ensure the status quo at half time, despite a Westside short corner in the last minute of the half making the home fans nervous.

The second half began much as the first finished, with Westside controlling possession, and Melville happy to play on the counter attack. This time though, the Wolves were finally able to capitalise, converting a short corner eight minutes in. The goal was scored by McDougall, who hit the ball low and hard, forcing a deflection off the keeper’s glove into the back of his own net.

The goal spurned Melville into life, which had a goal back just four minutes later after Ben Meacock whacked the ball home after the Westside defence failed to clear the ball from a short corner.

Melville had another goal in no time, with a short corner converted by Dan White, who flicked the ball between the Westside custodian’s legs.

The Wolves went in search of an equaliser, as Melville was forced to play the rest of the half on the back foot.

Westside had a number of opportunities from short corners, but were let down by some poor execution on the trap.

The Wolves task got harder when a yellow card was shown to Adam Bache with five minutes left to go. Despite the setback, the Wolves made the Melville faithful sweat by forming a number of attacks in the final minutes.

Melville’s resolute defence however, was typified by keeper Tristan Clemons, who rushed off his line in the last minute to smother another Wolves attack as they held on for the win.

Westside host UWA next week while Melville face a tough ask against YMCC at home.

===========================================================================

That should give you a good example of how to do a pretty detailed match report, and I'm sure it's not perfect either, so you should have some fun poking holes in it.

Till next time.

(Damn I'm getting conceited)

What is wrong with the classifications board?

I'm back after my tussle with the flu, and I'm mad as all hell.

Last week I was browsing Kotaku when I saw a story on Fallout 3 being refused an MA15+ classification in this country, effectively banning the full version from this country. Why?

Apparently because your avatar could shoot morphine, with positive in-game effects. Now, I'm not advocating drug use, it's been a huge issue in our country regarding the indigenous population (especially morphine in the NT), but this whole thing smacks of hypocrisy and ignorance from the rating board.

For example, I just have to browse my DVD collection to see that 21 Grams has been given a MA15+ rating. Something tells me that 21 Grams may just be a teeny little harmful and shocking to young minds than Fallout 3 would ever be. Even SAW IV, yes, SAW IV has been given a MA15+ rating according to classification office's press page!

So what? It's not being given a MA15+ rating in this country, can't you just make it an adults-only game? Well, as it turns out, no.

You see, there's no R18+ classification in this country regarding games.

Wha? But...don't they know adults actually play games? Well, one look at the board may give you some clues.

Do me a favour, go to the classification board's website www.classification.gov.au and look at the board listing.

Notice the hilariously named Donald McDonald, the director of the board doesn't look a day under 60 (his bio said he got a BAComm in 1961, so you make a guesstimate). Do you think he's ever...actually played a video game in his life?

Or is it simply that his only experience with video games stems from watching his grandchildren play?

No wonder there's no R18+ classification for games in this country! The prevailing attitude seems to be that ADULTS DON'T PLAY GAMES! Of course they don't! The rest of the board doesn't exactly paint a youthful picture either.

Coming from a theoretical perspective (as these board members must be), video games do seem more harmful than film or books.

The logic is there, video gaming is a highly interactive medium which can be easily imitated. As gamers though, I bet you you've never learned to load a gun by playing GTAIV or Call of Duty. However, anybody who knows a thing or two about film can tell you that it's a highly interactive medium too.

Through the practice of semiotics and verisimilitude, a film involves the viewer. Viewers are not passive in making meaning, but are active in it.

It's easy to see why the classification board may have this view of video games, but that's not the biggest outrage in all this. There's another player in all this that could put pressure on the board, but idly sits by while gamers are treated like children.

WHERE ARE THE CIVIL LIBERTARIAN GROUPS ON THIS ONE!?

You see the peak bodies on the news all the time, and yet they don't seem to be sticking up for our rights to play the same game the rest of the world will be playing. Could it be that censorship is just not a civil liberty issue anymore?

Unlikely. More likely however, is that they're ignorant of the whole thing.

They're kind of busy fighting lock-out laws and debating the alco-pops tax, so getting the full Fallout 3 here, and creating a R18+ classification is pretty low on their list of priorities. Who could blame them, even the most ardent gamer will tell you that these issues are more important than gaming.

There is something you can do to spur them into action though.

Instead on writing your angry diatribes to the classification board, write them to the civil liberatrian groups, lambasting their lack of action on this. Start with one, and if they don't do anything, move onto the next one.

Gamers writing angry letters to the classifications board will do nothing, however, if the civil liberatrian groups start getting tons of letters, the whole thing may just start to look like a juicy issue for them to pounce on.

So gamers, I implore you, don't post your letters to the classification board, post them to civil libertarian groups instead. There's bitching from gamers, and then there's bitching from peak bodies. Guess which one the classification board will listen to?

What is wrong with match reporting?

As some of you may know, I've been doing a bit of match reporting on the side. It's good experience in a sports-mad Australian market and I'm getting a cool grand for doing it too.

I thought it would be cool if I took y'all through the process behind writing a good match report (because I'm just that conceited).

Let's start with the match itself, and how to take notes on it.

There's no set rules on how you take notes during the game, but there's one thing that's a must. Legibility. If I had a dollar for every time I've gotten home from a game, looked at my notes and just thought 'wah....gah....zah?' I'd be cruising in the Carribean with a model on each arm...good looking ones.

Anyhow, you can't write a report from memory, so make sure your notes are legible. Secondly, work out a system early.

If you start with a page and try to write down everything you see, you will end up with 20 pages of notes and a headache. You need to clearly label things like shots, goals, injuries, and the time they occurred.

If you do what I've described above, you'll have the bones of your report. To make it sparkle however, you've got to give the reader theoppurtunity to 'be there'.

By this I mean, including things like 'They controlled the ball well, creating space to work into' or 'they upped the tempo after half time'. These seem like small things, but they'll lend you report a great deal of credibility, and set you apart from the next guy.

Once you have your report done, you've got to keep in mind that you need to be flexible.

For example, at the moment I write for an actual sporting body. I write a main report for their site which usually comes in at around 300-400 words and gives a throrough overview of the game. Then, I have to send off a report to various community newspapers.

This brings up two things.

Number one, they're only after about 150 words, so you have to take the scapel to your article, to give the papers the bare bones. It's a challenge to say the least. The second complication is thinking about your audience. For example, if you send off your article to a paper whoch covers the area team B is based on, they probably don't want to see the headline "Team A post stirring win", it's probably best to go with "Team B narrolwly lose".

Anyhow, I hope I gave any aspiring student journos a little insight into match reporting. It's definitely something that'll help increase your skill set and you get to take in a game too.

What is wrong with Top Spin 3?

It's got a learning curve like a motherfucker. Here's the review.

======================================================

As sporting video games start to look more and more like their real-life counterparts, the battle between Top Spin and Virtua Tennis rages on like an epic Nadal vs Federer five-setter.

With each itineration, they seek to smack the competition into next week, but with contrasting approaches. Whereas both series are absolutely gorgeous and graphically realistic, it can only be said that Top Spin offers hard core tennis fans a true 'simulation'.

Whereas Virtua Tennis offers players the chance to smack the ball anywhere, regardless of position, timing or execution of a shot, Top Spin takes these things into account before finally you hit the ball into the net. It's phenomenal what exactly is going on under the hood in each match of Top Spin. The attention to detail of player mechanics and physics is truly a sight to behold for the true tennis fan.

For example, if you release the shot button too early, you'll find that your player will reach for the ball, and end up looking like a complete prat. Push it too late and you'll be on the back foot for the next shot, which is absolutely crucial. You see, whereas in Virtua Tennis you can pretty much get away with anything, in Top Spin, there's a flow to each point.

When you hit the ball over the net, you immediately have to be nimble of feet and mind. You have to be thinking about where the opposition is going next, and if you take your eye off the ball, you'll be on a one-way ticket to loser-ville.

So Top Spin offers great simulation and the ultimate tennis experience, but does this necessarily equal fun?

Well, for all of its inaccuracies, Virtua Tennis was awful fun. In between matches, you could play fun mini-games that boosted your skill and kicked ass. What can be more fun than trying to ten-pin bowl with a giant tennis ball?

Then there was the music in each match, that J-Pop annoyance that grew on you until you found yourself humming it at work while practising your backhand. Online play was great, with a good mix of people just looking to have a good time while hitting a few balls around, but with Top Spin, fun is a dirty word.

Nope, it's all about the business for Top Spin. It markets itself as a sports-simulator, no more, no less. This latest version is no exception to the rule, with sparse fun things to do. There's matches, more matches, and then 'top spin school' (which doesn't offer spanking from Anna Kournikova for being naughty, killjoys).

Then again, Top Spin offers tennis fans what Virtua Tennis can't in officially licensed grand slams. With the notable exception of Wimbledon, they're all there. Roland Garros, New York and Melbourne to make the player feel as if they're really playing in front of massive crowds for the most coveted prizes in tennis. It's an experience made all the richer by the crap you had to go through to get there.

I speak of course of the career mode. Whereas the career mode of Virtua Tennis could be conquered in two days, Top Spin has the learning curve of a wall comprised of Roger Federer on a personal vendetta against you.

I spoke of the sheer complication of the match mechanics before, and you'll have to learn all of these if you have any hope of progressing past the junior tournaments. I warn you now, if you're not a fan of tennis, this WILL put you off tennis for life.

The underlying question in all this is, as with all sports games, does realism equate with fun? What's the use of having the most realistic game if it's no fun? What's the use of have a fun game if it's not realistic? That perhaps is a question to be left in the wind, to be decided by the consumers with the almighty dollars.

As for any sort of recommendation, I can only say that if you want the most realistic experience of tennis you can get from your couch, go with Top Spin. If you just want a hit up with mates, go with Virtua Tennis.

Don't even get me started on Wii tennis.

What is wrong with sickness?

Gleeeaaarrrggggh! Having the flu sucks, to state the overwhelmingly obvious.

I've already had to get somebody to cover a shift at work for me this week, meanwhile my boss is pissed off at me for another reason. Staying home instead of working doesn't exactly rectify that situation.

Anyhow, this will be a short post about how the new site is progressing, and what sort of freelance work I've managed to conjure up.

Well, I'm now doing match reports for Hockey WA, which involves going to two games a week, and typing up a brief 200 word report on the matches. So far so good, and despite my limited knowledge on the game of hockey, my employer seems to be happy with them, describing them as great.

During our initial meeting, she mentioned that she'd probably send back the first few week's reports to highlight where I was going wrong, but so far she hasn't. I must be doing okay then.

I've decided to hold back on getting any other work during the break, as the new site will keep my occupied enough.

So far, the biggest hurdle is just getting a site up and running. I have very limited expertise in online publishing, so it's all a bit over my head. I've got a production cycle all set up, and a clear focus on our content. Registering a domain name and buying some hosting space is next. I'll probably end up getting ripped off big time, but it's worth it.

Imagine if I could put 'editor-in-chief, the anti-cookie' on my resume! That'll look absolutely fantastic on any resume, and show that I do have the ambition to one day run a publication.

Anyhow, I just wanted to write a few words on Yahtzee's latest rant.

It seems that the Escapist legal department is out of town....or drunk the past few weeks, as Yahtzee has been given an extremely long leash.

First he blatantly does a bit of 'conflict of interest' by professing his love of Cornetto's during his review of Haze. You know...the brand of ice-cream who advertised with the site in the .au region.

Then he unloads on Control-Alt-Del in a very thinly veiled attack.

If I were at the escapist, I'd be telling Yahtzee to cool his jets a bit. I know that he brings in enormous numbers to the site, but they have to draw the line somewhere.

Anyhow, I'm going to go and lie down now, and hope I don't die at work tomorrow. It'll look bad for the customers.

Update re: stud muffin

I think she may be onto me...either that or I'm extremely paranoid.

She referred to me mockingly as a 'stud muffin' today....

more as it develops...

Oh, and I've decided to make a new site, and the process will be chronicled on here hopefully.

What is wrong now?

3scapsim has been taken off the air by its editor Melaisis due to a whole bunch of bat-shit craziness happening. I don't blame the guy. Anyhow, somebody has to fill the void....

=====================================================================

Dear Escapist readers,

You may or may not be aware of the demise of Melasis’s site 3scapism. This was a site which was dedicated to showcasing the work of aspiring game journalists and reviewers in a place where it could be seen in one convenient location.

I’m not going into the reasons why 3scapsim is no more, because I simply don’t know enough about it. What I will say however is that it was a fantastic innovation that I’m sure every current games journalist would have been grateful to have access to when they were starting out.

I’m here to announce that the void left by 3scapism will be filled.

I’m starting my own games site, I say ‘my own’, I really mean ‘your’ gaming site. I’m not sure of the name yet, but no doubt it will rock your world.

This simply won’t be a mirror of 3scapsim though, it will [i]improve[/i] on it.

First off, instead of limiting content to video games, I will also be accepting games op-ed pieces. These ideally would be well-written and thought provoking articles written by journalists looking to make their mark in the industry. It would also go above the level of ‘GTAIV IZ DA BEST AND HEREZ WHY’ fan-boy style of writing.

These articles will be the opportunity for writers to take a look at the industry as a whole. Where we were, where we are and where we’re going.

Secondly, we will be accepting film reviews and op-ed pieces at this point too. I know some of you hold a great passion for cinema, and some of you are even film students. What better way to demonstrate your love for cinema by than writing about it?

Apart from new content, we will also be beholden to a real-world production cycle.

That means that each week, prospective article will run the ringer of subbing. This includes checking articles for fact and legal breaches and checking for spelling and grammar. I’m sorry to say that each article will be subject to a word limit too.

This is the way it’s done in the real world, and I’m thinking at this stage the word limit will be 1250 words. This is to ensure that copy on the site isn’t too cluttered, and also gives prospective journalists practice and discipline.

We will also be beholden to UK English. That means ‘colour’, not ‘color’. Don’t fear though, because of the process we will have in place, if you do slip into Americanisms, we will fix it for you.

We don’t wish to discourage anybody at all from writing, but I had to pick a spelling style that is maintained on the whole site, and I’m from Australia, so UK British it is.

At this point in time, there are no style specifics, and this is to encourage creativity from our writers. There’s nothing worse than writing a whiz-bang fantastic article and then having to go through it with a fine tooth comb.

I should point out, that these are all preliminary thoughts, and over the next three weeks these will be developed more fully, and a mission statement will be drafted.

What I’m looking for now is people who want to write. People that love writing so much that it borders on the legal in Missouri. In other words, contributors.

These people would have their own style, their own flair and their own words to preach. If this sounds appealing to you, please contact me using the details below. At this stage, all applicants will be considered, please do not be afraid to give it a crack. It’s your future, grab it.

As I alluded to, I am also looking for subs. These will be the people who have noticed the grammatical mistakes in this letter. Yes, pedants, I’m looking for you. The plan is to check about 5-10 articles per week and this will give you great experience at subbing, and will look FANTASTIC on your resume.

I’m hoping that we can send feedback to journalists each week detailing where they went wrong, where they went right, and where they went gonzo. That way, not only will the site be a functioning media outlet, it will be a great learning and training ground.

I’m also looking for web-wizards who will not only help maintain the site, but help innovate and bring new things to the table. Video content at this stage is off the table, but it’s something I’ll be looking into.

Lastly, I’m looking for enthusiastic researchers. These will be the people who bug the hell out of game developers and their PR departments looking for that juicy exclusive that will take our site from amateur to professional.

The hope is someday, when we call a game company, we get someone who isn’t in a meeting.

In summary, the groundwork has been laid my Melaisis, it’s up to us not only to replicate, but improve. Not to be happy with the status quo, but to innovate.

Please submit all ideas, job applications and articles to james.r.mcgrathATgmail.com or contact me on the forums.

With all things running smoothly, we should have our first update live on the 27^th July.

From

James McGrath (AKA Hey Joe)

P.S- All name suggestions welcome